You're Not Too Sensitive—You Might Have RSD (And No, You're Not Making It Up)

*With insights from Dr. Megan Neff

Hey you—yeah, you, the one who’s been called “too sensitive” your whole life. The one who spirals into panic after getting a short text back. The one who replays conversations in your head for days, wondering if you said something wrong. Or maybe you’re a parent watching your child crumble after the smallest criticism, and you’re wondering, “What is happening here?”

Let’s talk about something called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, or RSD. Because if this sounds even remotely familiar, I want you to know—you are not broken, you are not overreacting, and you are definitely not alone.

What the Heck Is RSD?

RSD is a real and deeply painful experience that happens when your brain and body have an outsized reaction to perceived or actual rejection. We’re talking full-body shutdown, racing thoughts, self-loathing, panic, the works. It’s like your nervous system hits the panic button every time you think someone is mad at you—or worse, disappointed in you.

Now, let me be clear: this is not you being dramatic. This is not attention-seeking behavior. This is a neurological and emotional response—one that’s often linked with ADHD, autism, or trauma histories. Dr. Megan Neff, a brilliant neurodivergent psychologist who studies and writes about this stuff, breaks it down beautifully. She describes RSD as an experience where rejection doesn’t just hurt—it crushes.

It's Not All in Your Head (Well... It Is, But Not Like That)

The emotional pain of RSD can feel just as intense as physical pain. People who live with it often say that even minor criticism feels like being punched in the gut. And because your brain is wired to avoid pain, you might start avoiding situations altogether—relationships, opportunities, new things—because the risk of rejection just feels too high.

Let me pause here and say this again: You’re not weak. You’re not a “snowflake.” You’re navigating the world with a nervous system that’s constantly on high alert. And when people don’t understand that, it can make you feel like the problem is you. Spoiler alert: it’s not.

What Does RSD Look Like in Real Life?

Here’s how it might show up:

• You get ghosted by a friend and your mind spirals into “They hate me” or “I’m a terrible person.”

• Your boss gives you constructive feedback and suddenly you’re fighting back tears in the bathroom.

• Your partner takes longer than usual to reply, and you’re mentally packing your emotional bags.

Or maybe you're a parent and your kid melts down after getting a B on a paper or withdraws completely after a tough social interaction. You’re not seeing stubbornness—you’re seeing shame.

So What Do You Do About It?

First, name it. Naming what you’re experiencing gives you power. When you realize this has a name—and other people feel it too—it’s a total game-changer.

Second, get curious. Dr. Neff has some amazing tools and workbooks that help people understand and manage their RSD. Learning how your brain works is an act of radical self-care. You can check her resources out at https://neurodivergentinsights.com

Third, talk to someone. A therapist like me— someone who understands trauma, neurodivergence, and RSD—can help you build the skills to calm your nervous system, challenge the inner critic, and tolerate uncomfortable feelings without being taken out by them.

Therapy isn’t about “fixing” you. It’s about helping you build tools to navigate a world that doesn’t always make room for people like you—and to remember that you deserve to take up space, rejection sensitivity and all.

Final Pep Talk

If you’ve been walking around feeling like something’s wrong with you, hear this: you matter. You are wired for deep sensitivity, deep care, and deep connection. That’s a beautiful thing.

So, whether you’re reading this for yourself or for someone you love, just remember: having RSD doesn’t make you fragile—it makes you human. And being human is messy and beautiful and sometimes, yes, really freaking hard. But you’ve got this. And you’re not alone.

*Alexa Griffith, LMHC, LCAC, NCC, RPT is a Licensed Mental Health Therapist. Alexa enjoys providing individual counseling and family counseling. She also provides play therapy for children, as well as teen and adolescent counseling via telehealth or in office. Alexa's practice serves the Indianapolis area, including Carmel, Fishers, Noblesville, Zionsville, and Westfield. Learn more at AlexaGTherapy.com